it sounds so clique...

i've never wanted to be one of those girls that was so attached to guys, and im glad i'm not, but theres this one guy....

i've known him for a long time and we were really close, and we dated on and off and would still be together if it wasnt for the distance, i think. and i don't know what happened but we're not talking as much and im afraid he got over me and i'm just left here. trying to get over him for so long and nothing's working. i mean, i havn't seen him in over a year. i don't know why i still care. i don't want to. and i don't know what to do.

i hate admitting that i really like a guy. it makes you feel vulnerable, but i've been holding this in and i needed to let it out.

i know everything happens for a reason, but this kinda hurts.

cupcakes and some...interesting things...

yeah, yeah, i know.

it's been QUITE a while. i've just been intensely busy.

i finally got away from the rush of things to speak today(:

ok, so today, me and a group of people from my school went to the Helping Hands Mission, it was SO fun! a lot of times people hear that and go 'oh, that must've been a lot of grungy, boring work, but it wasnt. i mean, it kind of depends on your attitude, but i think it would've been really hard to find something bad in that kind of experience.

at the mission, we bagged clothes for people all over the world, well sort of. there weren't many clothes to bag, they were all already bagged and there were much more than a billion black trash bags full of clothes in a huge room, like the entire room was filled from the floor to the ceiling!

us kids started a sort of assembly line...a couple people would take a bag out, pass it down the line and the people at the end would put it in a shopping kart and the person rolling the kart would drive it outside to the waiting truck!

we had a blast and at the same time helped a bunch of people! in my opinion a lot of people don't help out enough. so many take and take and take from this world, that we forget to give back. while i may never know what it feels like to have nothing, many people have. and it flat out sucks. those people need more than a little money to get back on their feet. they need to know someone actually cares.

so i encourage you to give back in whatever for you find possible. not convienient!

when you help, keep in mind, it's not about you.

ohh boy...

its been so long... school has really got me on the edge, i mean, i've been managing my homework quite well though(: so i want updates!! how is everyone?! you can comment on this post or shoot me an email if you like(: todaysteenblog@me.com im totally open to questions and your opinions about stuff, since iv shared a little about me, my life and views on things, i'd like to know some of what i spark in your imagination lol if i spark anything at all(: im most curious to hear peoples views on high school at the moment..... but anything is cool! so God bless all of you out there in the world who are on the quest that is Life !

the rain in summer

i did the best i could/: it's not the best picture, but i have to say it's pretty spiffy(: i drew that in 7th? grade i think.

i realize recently, that music is a privilege. a gift. a liberty i fear would be very difficult to live without. music, along with all other forms of art (its a longer list than you would assume), is a way of self expression. a way to express emotion. it's the way i often express emotion. it's also a way to speak to people.

you don't always have to have lyrics though, you can use just instruments, any instrument for that matter.

there's a movie coming out, It Might Get Loud, about, 3 guitarists: The Edge(U2), Jimmy Page(Led Zeppelin) , and Jack White(The White Stripes). here's 2 links to where you can watch the trailer(:

http://www.sonyclassics.com/itmightgetloud/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4EvZtsXz7w&fmt=18

my parents are going to an upcoming U2 concert((: so jelous, but they're like my mom's favorite band so i thought she should see them in concert! she told me that she only needed to see them in concert once(: just once and it'd be cool, so i'm excited for her!

so yess. enjoy the liberty that is music. but quality music, music with real meaning. not immature crude music, people, i mean really? we could do so much better.

'oi with the poodles already'

i have nothing to write about. nothing. i mean, if i thought hard enough, i'm sure i could totally scrounge up something real interesting to talk about, something deep. or maybe something that just makes you think....

the title is a quote from Gilmore Girls, one of the greatest shows ever(: sometimes i wish i could live in a small town where everyone knows each other...that'd be fun.

ohh! i think i'll just list random things....

- school is starting monday for me...

- sorta scary, but it's cool, growing up happens eventually

- not sure i wanna grow up

- urg...i just got a text message(:

- so my view on this band The Classic Crime...you need to listen to them. they're my fav band ever and are amazing, lyrically and toneagely(:

- fettucini alfredo, amazing in every possible way(:

- i'm planning on totally not having a job in which you need to do math...i'd get fired the next day.

- maybe that's an exaggeration.

- maybe

- i need band suggestions.

- who shall i listen to.......

- okay, i'm convinced i don't need to date cuz dating is overrated and i shud just live life while i can, but at the same time you begin to miss it...

- i mite just keep you people up to date on my relationship life(;

- well.....

peace people! hope ya'll had a great summer!

looking back on parents...

okay, so me and my mom get along fine most of the time. yes, occasionally we have our disagreements, but if you saw me and my mom together, you'd think she was my best friend. which she is(:

yeah, i am a teenager, and the whole stereotypical picture we all get in our heads when we hear that word is something like....drugs, sex, sneaking out, always texting and on the phone, not having a good relationship with your parents...and so forth. i am glad to say that i have not experienced any of those things. except the whole texting thing and the parents thing.

there was once a time when i despised my parents. we've all been there. i am proud to say that me and my parents are really close. but i've had tons of friends that would say the opposite. considering the fact that a lot of teenagers parents let them do whatever they want because they seem to not care, or don't have the energy to care, those kids got into things they definitely shouldnt have. i look back on those times when i wanted desperately to go places with those kids without parental supervision, and understand how smart my mom was. she saved my butt. and i'm sure she'll be doing a lot more of that in the future too.

the thing is, then, i could see, but not with as much clarity as i can now. not literally but somehow, when i've been made aware, or even when i havent, of someone's situation, i can oftentimes see very in depth from their point of view. my mom tells me it's a gift from God, which i'm sure it is. he's given my mother incredible insight. something very hard to describe, otherwise i would, but i believe she's right. although it can be painful at times, it helps me to understand people.

i had a lot of friends with terrible home lives. they always acted as though it was no big deal, when i could tell from the way they acted and the way they dressed that they were insecure. that they just wanted someone to care about them. not to be put down by their so-called friends. not to be shunned by people.

my 7th grade English teacher was the best. and my classmates made it even more fun. never a boring day in that classroom. what i remember most about that teacher, is that she cared. she cared about what those kids were getting themselves into. she cared about their feelings. if something was wrong, she would ask you. not in front of everyone. and if you didn't want to talk about it, she respected that but let you know she was there all the same.

there were posters all over her walls, but i only remember one. it was something about the fact that you were fighting your own battle, but no matter how hard it was at the moment, you have no right to take it out on anyone else, cause they're fighting a battle to.

that poster was right, is right. we are all fighting battles. you, me, and everyone else.

someone loses everyday.

but you can prevent that.

i know i sound like a commercial, but it's true. i've known kids that have tried to take their own lives. and kids that have. some because they don't fit in. some because theyre picked on every day. some because they feel that no one cares and that no one will listen to them.

parents, i feel, have a roll to play in this. its not they're fault, unless they havnt cared about their kid, but anyway.....when i go to my parents and am feeling alone. i'm not looking for them to get mad and tell me i'm not. i just want them to stand there and listen. let me get everything out. even if i don't mean all of it.

they think they are. and i know they're trying. but they don't. they always fight back. i'm not even trying to fight! i just want someone to listen. so i don't have to hold everything in.

so parents: just listen. if your kid is mad, sad, frustrated. just sit there and let them get everything out, and know that if they say something crazy or really, really mean. they won't mean it in the future.

and kids: be patient with your parents. they're learning(;

i honestly do....

miss a person.

we were really close. in Texas.

i was on one of my old emails, reading through my huge sent folder. i had a lot of emails from him. he said something in a stupid forward, but it made me cry. all those emails made me cry, but i liked this.....

'Love is like writing a book, you start wih a sentence, see where it goes, you get to a page, and it's going good. you get to a chapter, and you see a mistake, then another chapter and a couple more mistakes. The your almost finished, and you get the book edited, so the mistakes aren't there anymore. and it's a wonderful peice of work. but then. it all just comes to it's ultimate end. when you finish it, and you make the last mistake.'

mood rings...

when i was younger, i thought mood rings were the coolest. every time there was one nearby, i'd press my finger hard against the colorful surface and stare in awe as it changed colors. only later did i realize that it was just heat sensitive/: sorry if that ruined any hopes and dreams out there...

i did perhaps learn something about faith. that mood ring told me how i was feeling. and i believed it, even if before i wasnt feeling sad, i would think about something sad. i was being controlled by a puny little ring....yeah, just slightly strange.

only recently did i realize this, but all the same, i let a ring controll my moods as long as i was in possession of it. weird......................

lol yeah, this is a random post, but i feel as though it had to be shared. mood rings are used for mind control.

just so you know...

ohh, people out there...you must listen to this song(i thought it made sense to mention it here(:

Mood Rings by Relient K(an amazing band btw! i saw them in concert and they were RADICAL to a maximum!)